When you first meet someone, there is this feeling of excitement and love that fills you up. All it seems she does is smile and laugh, and your heart flutters. She’s perfect for you and everything you’ve ever wanted. And if you’re not with her, you can’t wait to be and think about her nonstop.
Sounds familiar? Well, most guys through this, it is very typical.
It is a honeymoon period in the relationship and one of the most exciting times in your life. The truth is, as time goes on, the relationship starts to settle in, and it becomes more routine than anything else.
While some individuals can’t go a day without seeing each other or having to touch and cuddle constantly. Others prefer being on their own and don’t want the pressure of guilt every time they go out for a drink with friends or visit family without you tagging along.
It is perfectly fine and healthy; no matter how serious both of you are in this committed relationship, there needs to be enough space.
Giving her space or giving him space is vital in any healthy relationship, and we should understand that they are essential in making a relationship work.
Why does she want space
“I am her everything. Why would she want space and be away from me?”
You must first eliminate the concept and accept that every short or long-term relationship requires work. At some point in time, both of you will simply want time for yourself to go about your things for a few days.
It is not to say that you don’t love each other or she is up to something. The fact is that everyone needs space to breathe; wanting space is human nature.
If you’ve been together for a long time, you might find it easy to be with each other. You’ve probably spent weeks together, go out on dates, and every minute detail of her life is available to you.
So it doesn’t seem like she wants space anymore because she’s open about everything; the truth is that this is what you think, not her.
Regardless of whoever we are, there will be things on her mind that she may not want or need to talk to you about. It is not that she does not trust you, but instead, she might be considering something that you might not approve of, or she may feel bad talking to you about it.
In such cases, she needs her little space to share what is on her mind with you without feeling obligated.
So when she tells you “, she needs space,” do not misconstrue it as if she is going to leave you, instead understand she might be having a lot on her mind and needs time to herself.
At the same time, you should also take a moment to reflect on your actions too. Are you pushing her to talk about something that she is not comfortable with? Are you feeling insecure because maybe she was out late?
Signs that she needs space
Most guys overlooked this and failed to notice signs that your partner sometimes needs her girl space.
The problem is that she may want to come out and tell you she needs space but isn’t yet ready or doesn’t know how to say it.
To be a great partner, instead of trying to pin her down for ‘the truth’ constantly, simply learn to pick up on the subtle signs so that you can help her through what is happening without any further drama.
Here are some common signs that she might be missing her girl space.
Lack of enthusiasm in your plans
She doesn’t seem to want to go out with you as often as before, and you start to see a drop in her energy levels. Another thing to notice is that she may ask you if it’s okay for her to go out with friends or family instead of volunteering herself.
Slow responses to your texts or calls
She doesn’t reply to your texts and calls immediately all the time anymore. For instance, she might take longer to reply or not be available at all.
When you call her, it may even seem like she is avoiding your calls or that she’s avoiding you because of how slow or late the response is.
Keep things to herself
She may not be quick to tell you about the things on her mind and is more hesitant than usual to share anything with you. You used to be the first person she would call, and now it may seem like she wants to keep everything for herself.
It may be work or other stuff, but she might constantly seem to have something on her mind that is distracting from being together with you. She may seem distant and hesitant to answer questions you ask her.
Lot of errands and chores to do
She might be spending a lot more time at home these days and has a long list of errands that she needs to complete. It seems like she is busy every moment, with distractions popping up when you try to hang out.
Distancing herself in intimacy
She doesn’t initiate cuddles or sex as often anymore and doesn’t seem as open to intimacy.
When you do manage to get intimate, she might not be so responsive and seems distant during the act itself.
Shorter dates or time spent with you
Dates and time spent together become noticeably dull and mundane for her, and she rarely attempts to do anything about it.
The excitement when you started dating is no longer there, and everything seems dull and uninteresting.
Although she still loves you with all her heart, the excitement of getting to know you is no longer there for her.
She starts becoming very comfortable when around you, which makes her lose interest in keeping things fresh and exciting.
Small talk becomes a scarce thing when spending time with you making your conversations.
Why giving a girl space is important
If you went through a few relationships, you might feel like you know it all, and you believe that you should spend time with her to the best of your ability whenever you can.
You believe that you do not need space, and the same would apply to your partner, which is incorrect.
What would happen if you kept putting a bottle to the brim and filling it until it was full? Isn’t it true that when something is too full, it bursts? What occurs if you take up all of her time in her existence?
A woman feels smothered, and frustrations rise; when you are over-controlling and thinks he knows best, it is like you derive theory indicating that if you give her space, she’ll forget about you.
Nothing good can be taken away from people who twist things around, even if you and I feel that your intentions are excellent.
Individuals who are afraid of abandonment might be clingy in relationships because they fear losing the other person. They may fear that if they leave them alone for a while or give them some space, then their partner will abandon them. It is incorrect and will only lead to problems in the relationship.
Remember that a woman is more than her body. She resides in her physicality, which she gets to tell you what to do with it all day long, don’t think it’s any different at night.You are not entitled to anything from your partner because of gender or race or living under the same roof
No matter how much you love someone, if you cannot see how she feels smothered by you, they will eventually leave you.
Boundaries are needed in every relationship, so is respect for each other’s personal space and emotional needs. You need to know when to relax or when to back off, give her space at the appropriate time.
A woman should feel that her needs and emotions are as important as yours. You can’t expect her to be happy 24/7 because she has a life, too; yeah, you might be the center of it, but she needs time for herself regardless of what’s going on in her life.
When you start spending every waking moment together, perhaps it is time to give each other some space.
Give her space when she tells you she needs it, even if it’s just for a few hours. Do not tag along with her on every little thing, especially if it interests her or makes her happy. A woman should spend time doing things by herself without feeling like she is neglecting you. If she feels like you’re not okay with that, then it’s just further evidence of your need to control her.
Why is she pushing me away
So once you pick up the signs, you need to start asking yourself exactly what is the reason she is pushing you away.
Relationships are a lot of work from the beginning, all relationships require effort from both of you, and it doesn’t end after marriage or kids. For your relationship to last, you both need to put in the effort daily.
But what if she’s not?
What if, even after you’ve been together with her for months, she doesn’t want to put in the work?
Why is she pushing you away?
Why does she not want to give it a chance?
It could be a direct result of many other relationship-related problems that are not discussed.
Let’s take a look at some of them.
You are becoming needy without realizing
You let your friends and family fall to the wayside because you’re so wrapped up in trying to please her and making sure that she’s happy, even if it means neglecting yourself.
You are so concerned that she doesn’t want to be with you that you become needy without realizing it. You fear that she might leave you, so you start to cling to her.
Messed up a few relationships in the past
Your last relationship had betrayal or did not work, which considerably impacted your current relationship. You get very paranoid whenever there are other guys in the picture, ruining your current relationship. It subconsciously develops a behavior where you feel that she needs to always be within your sight or the same space as you are.
Lacking in abundance mentality
To be in an abundance mentality, you must not cling or demand anything from someone that could make them want to leave.
The issue is that when individuals enter relationships with this attitude, they are often ambiguous about their requirements and wants. They simply require someone to be around, which might cause difficulties in the relationship.
You Have Oneitis
What is Oneitis? To make it very simple for you means you are obsessed.
When you lose your independence and over-rely on your partner, the problem becomes that your world revolves around your partner.
In a nutshell, if you consume too much of anything, it’s never ideal, and if you’re obsessed with something, it’s a bad sign indicating that something isn’t quite right.
Your personal beliefs
You don’t realize how providing a woman space and not requiring her all of the time might improve her feelings for you and make her more committed.
You try very hard to impress her and be the best version of yourself, but in reality, this is repulsive because it suffocates her with your overwhelming neediness.
Many guys make these blunders without understanding that women like the way you are right now, not what you will become just to impress her because you are no longer who you are without realizing it.
Have proper relationship mindsets
When it comes to a healthy relationship, you need to adjust your mentality to nurture deeper feelings and emotions between the two of you.
Don’t ignore the warning indicators.
If she is giving you the warning signs that she wants more space, then understand that this is coming from a place of concern. She most likely had seen you overreact to her previous attempts to impart space, which has caused issues in your relationship.
Learn to listen
Do not be afraid to listen to her because so much of your fear comes from worrying about how she will react when you attempt to set boundaries.
Communication is key to deeper feelings
Let her know what is bothering you instead of projecting your insecurities on her. Tell her exactly how it makes you feel and why it bothers you.
Women often mistake this behavior for insecurity, which can make them feel uncomfortable or unattractive.
Have your own life
There are opportunities for both partners to grow as individuals, which means that each person should have some time to themselves.
Do not be afraid to embrace your passions, hobbies, or interests by yourself. You should be able to share it with your partner, but understand that while you love her, you are not responsible for making her happy all the time.
Maintain your individuality
Many people get in the habit of living for their significant other, but this is a difficult way to live because one day, should they will leave, all you have is yourself.
When you begin treating her like an addiction, she feels suffocated and will begin to resent you for trying to change her.
Compromise – Don’t sacrifice yourself
After you’ve learned how much space and boundaries are required to have a healthy relationship, it’s critical to remember that this does not imply sacrificing your pleasure or interests.
She should never be able to determine your life choices or prevent you from experiencing new things.
Threats do not work
When you try to threaten her or force your way into her life, she will react very negatively because it appears as though you are trying to extinguish her independence.
By doing this, you are putting your happiness into someone else’s hands.
If she does not comply, you will feel resentful and frustrated because the relationship is no longer satisfying for you. The results of this can be disastrous both emotionally and physically.
Don’t act like a boss
It’s one thing to set boundaries, but another to act like an overbearing, intimidating boss.
If she feels like she is constantly walking on eggshells and you’re making demands of what she can and cannot do, then this relationship will not work.
Remember, she is your partner, wife to be, or already your spouse; she is not your employee.
Once again, be reminded that you don’t have to try too hard to impress her. A woman doesn’t fall in love with your potential; she falls in love with your already accomplished self.
When you’re constantly trying to be better than who you are right now, you come off as insecure, which is not attractive.
Benefits of giving her space
When you give her space, she will miss the way things are in the relationship.
Plus, such frustrations fuel sexual tension; the more she is frustrated, the more it fuels her desire for you. There must be a release if you want to keep her love and attraction.
It is why giving women space and allowing them to come to you is so important. She’ll approach at her speed, so allow her room.
You will not lose her if you decide to implement boundaries; she will appreciate this because it shows that you care about her. Many women admire men who are secure in their masculinity and embrace the boundaries that only they can set.
When people feel they are being controlled, even in minor ways, they will begin to resent and try their best to find ways to free themselves.
Giving her space is one of the most important things that you can do to maintain your relationship with immerse benefits.
- You’ll have a happier relationship.
- Your partner will be more attentive to you.
- You can stay sane in your relationship or dating life.
How to give her space
Giving her space is not rocket science. It simply means not smothering her with your neediness daily. Importantly respect her space like how you want her to respect your privacy as well.
The best way is to ask yourself what you would want your partner to do when you need space?
Just take a few moments and think about how a woman feels and stop being overly needy.
One of my recommendations is to have a serious conversation with her, explain your concerns, and open up. Tell her your intentions and what you like to do for her.
Most women, if not all, would be very appreciative and can even find you are more attractive at the same time.
Right Amount of Space to Give in a Healthy Relationship
What is too much space, and what is too little?
Of course, you want to give your partner enough space to prevent her from leaving you or losing interest.
However, once a woman feels you are trying to smother her with your neediness, she will become defensive and seek ways to escape from the relationship, which is not something you want.
In my opinion, the perfect amount of space is something you will have to find out on your own.
You can use no formula because every unique relationship has its own set of circumstances.
However, I feel it’s essential to give her enough space to feel comfortable where she has her own time but not too much space where she feels as if the romance has disappeared and you’ve lost interest.
15 Tips on giving her space
There are plenty of free tips on the internet, and the goal is the same: to give your loved one’s space.
How are you going to give her space?
What is enough? What is not enough?
How much and how to go about doing it correctly?
Plenty of questions and a few answers for you to consider; you need to be proactive but at the same time not smother her when you want to work on giving space.
Everyone is different, and it is a big mistake if you expect to use the same method to acquire the result you want. It does take a bit of effort to understand what she’s thinking and how you can cope and have better self-control over this situation.
Many men take a one size fits all approach which does more harm than good. You need to understand the perspective of woman space truly, and there are more than a few ways to do it.
There is no single best strategy, and the only way to do it is to spend some time learning about that viewpoint.
Here are some tips for you to consider, but you must remember to treat her differently. Every woman or girl is different; you need to understand them at a deeper level to allow the relationship to grow and be more fulfilling for both of you.
Be an attractive man and her best friend, make things happen by listening to what she wants.
For every effort, start small. If you are starting to give her space, start with just a bit of it.
Don’t overdo it because this would instead have the reverse effect and leave your partner feeling detached.
The key is that you must be able to layout boundaries by giving her enough space without cutting off ties completely.
Be Open About What You Want
If you feel the need to give her space, you must tell her clearly so that she does not constantly read into your actions leading to unnecessary miscommunication.
Let her know that there are certain times where you’d like to be alone and won’t mind if she leaves for a while.
After all, you’re not trying to push away from each other but to allow both parties to get what they want and need.
Don’t Be Afraid to Express Your Feelings
There needs to be an open line of communication between both of you.
It would only make the experience awkward if you suddenly start pulling away without any explanation to her.
Be proactive in letting her know how you are feeling, don’t wait for things to get worse before communicating with each other on the issues affecting your relationship.
Be honest and open with her about your feelings. There is no trickery involved when communicating your feelings, so don’t be afraid to let out how you feel at any time during this process.
Don’t hold anything back from one another; only resentment will build up, leading to further issues.
Create “Do Not Disturb” Zones
You can do certain activities like working on your laptop, reading, or taking a nap without distraction.
Try giving her space during this time by allowing her to do the same thing while doing her task.
The key is not to get in each other’s way and allow enough time for both of you to relax.
Text each other less often
Stop flooding her phone with messages every few minutes
When you first start dating someone, it is fun to hear from them all the time. You must limit the amount of time you communicate with each other.
Having instant access all of the time will take away their independence and lead to lethargy in the long run.
Be patient with her and yourself
It is the most critical advice that you’ll ever need, give her space and allow yourself time as well.
Relationships are rarely worked fast, so don’t forget to take it slow and steady.
Visit your friend groups
Do your own thing such as visiting your friends without her.
Going out and spending time by yourself will allow you to appreciate the time spent with each other more afterward.
Learn a common activity that both of you enjoy doing together, then spend more time on that rather than focusing on other activities.
In your own free time, relax by yourself.
It will allow you to get more into your world and not feel like you are constantly tied down to your partner.
Both of you need to take time without the other person to understand each other better.
It can be distracting if there is always someone hanging on another person’s every action and word.
Take A Quick Vacation From Each Other
Plan a short vacation for her and her friends to get away from you for a short period.
It can be as simple as going on a weekend trip to get some fresh air and reflect on your life.
She needs to know that you trust her and would like her to enjoy herself and be independent.
Plan more date nights
While giving her space, it is also essential to plan out activities together, such as more date nights.
These can be simple plans such as going to a movie or dinner at a new restaurant.
Allowing time for each other and keeping it casual is necessary for both of you during this process.
When you start giving space, she may be uncomfortable and is unclear of your boundaries, be encouraging to her during this process.
Advise and encourage her to plan her time, be supportive, and trust her choices just as you would like her to trust your choice.
She may respond negatively but try not to show it. Be encouraging even during times of doubt for both of you.
Be positive about the whole thing and be patient with each other; the benefits will come later in your relationship.
Learn to compromise
Compromise will play a massive role in the success of many relationship problems.
If you want to go out, but she wants to stay in, find a time that you both can do one thing together, then split up the rest of the time.
It will allow both of you to have some space while also connecting more with each other.
Be understanding and reach out if needed without being demanding or pushy. When you’re constantly seeking more, you become lost in the relationship.
Learn to listen
In the same way, you like yourself to be heard or understood, learning to listen to her is equally critical.
When you communicate with her, it should always be mutual and talk about your feelings together and give each other space and encouragement.
Avoid being condescending, she has her own opinions, and you should respect her opinion.
Respect the boundaries
It is essential to respect the boundaries and be patient with yourself.
With time, she will feel more comfortable with you giving her space, so try not to push things too much at first.
When she knows that you are respecting her enough to let go a little bit, it will reassure everything is going according to plan for both of you.
Make sure you are not being too clingy and trust her judgment enough to have a good time without you as well.
In the same way, you should consider her space and understand those moments when she wants to have her own space.
Pay Attention to Her Life
Why do you ask?
Giving her space does not mean you being oblivious. Imagine having a bad day at work, or something terrible came up, and she is at her throat’s end.
It is the time where you need to be there for her and not push it off or ignore the situation because you are giving her space.
It is about managing the correct amount of space to be given, and as a result, she feels like you don’t care about her and would rather do your own thing instead.
Respect her emotions and give attention to what is essential; this will make her feel supported by you, which is crucial in any relationship.
When you show that you care about what happens in her life, she will start caring more about what happens in your life.
Final thoughts on giving her space
It’s tempting to try and fix everything on your own. Sometimes you need space to figure things out for yourself. Give her that space with these tips and tricks for maintaining healthy boundaries without losing hope or giving up altogether.
Remember, all relationships go through challenges at some point – so if she wants a little more time alone than usual, now is not the time to panic!
There are many benefits of giving her space to work on herself, so be patient and trust her enough to let her do what she needs to do.
Keep in mind that this is a process, so you need to take baby steps at first.
Eventually, you will find the balance between your needs as one, which is well worth the effort put into the relationship.
Her happiness is just as important as yours, and that both of you need to work together to grow together.
A happy, healthy relationship requires effort from both sides, so be patient with each other.