A better husband requires effort

Being better at marriage is something that every husband can put in more work, myself included.

Marriage is not easy, and many things go into making it successful; as we all know, it takes two hands to clap. It takes work and commitment from both parties for them to be successful.

You get many men asking “How to be a better husband” so that they can make their wives happy. Usually, I tend to respond with, “How would you like your wife to treat you then?”

Whether it is a better husband or better wife, there are many things that we can do, and all we need is to make some efforts to have a happy marriage.

Sometimes when you return from work, your mind would have been exhausted and all you want to do is sit on your couch and watch T.V., that’s ok but don’t forget, your missus feels the same if she is out of work or worst, taking care of the little ones and juggle between work at home, cooking, laundry, and the list goes on…

So you can start to be a better husband by simply spending time with her, complimenting how she looks or how hardworking she is.

You can also do little things that will make your wife feel like she’s important to you, such as cooking for her family, doing the laundry, and cleaning up after yourself. Compliment her physical appearance, bring her out on a date night, or send her text messages telling her that you adore her.

How can I improve myself to be a better husband?

Let’s reflect on ourselves, men, and see how we can be better husbands that our wives would love us more for. The key here is understanding what your wife needs from you.

• How much time do they need?
• What are their priorities in the household and outside of it?
• How can you balance them out for her so she’s fulfilled both at home, work, etc.?

Some women may like more attention than others or more help with the housework, while some are also extremely independent in their ways.

I can’t stress enough how important communication is in being a better husband. Some of these are tough for men because we’re not always good at expressing our feelings or verbalizing them well — but try!

There is no one size fits all; whatever it is, communicate as much as you can to your wife, so she knows and understands what’s important to you in being a better husband that makes her happy.

23 Marriage secrets to help you be a better husband

Make an effort to listen

It is not about you, and sometimes you need to sit down and listen and hear her out. Try to understand where she’s coming from so you know how to provide emotional support.

Many times, all your wife wants is for your to listen, she could be having a hard day, and she needs to let go of some steam, just like you when you want an ice-cold beer. The fact remains that there will be times that there is nothing you can do but listen and let her vent it out.

Do your share of emotional labor

The invisible work of running their house can take a serious toll. On your part, it means doing what you can to lighten your wife’s load.

It might mean taking on more of the cooking, dishwashing, and housecleaning so that she’ll have a little less to do when she gets home; or picking up her dry cleaning for her if you know how much she hates going out in public while pregnant (or anytime, really). It might even mean taking on more of the childcare so that she can get a little break.

A perfect husband seeks to understand his wife

Any good husband should become a learner from their wives; knowing her needs and what distinguishes her from others in your daily life helps. That’s especially important on transitional periods and stress, like after giving birth to a child or realizing a long deadline, try to stay on the same page and provide her with the support she needs.

A good husband suffers well

The main contributing factor to marital dissatisfaction is the stress problem. Many women feel that their husband does not share a load of responsibility in taking care of household chores; they feel like single mothers.

Moreover, when there is no understanding or consideration for her feelings and opinions, she withdraws emotionally from him to avoid being hurt again. A good husband must learn how to suffer from his wife’s emotional ups and downs and be there for her in the marriage.

The best relationships are those where both partners play active roles

Active roles are a big deal to most women, and a wife wants to be seen as an equal partner and not just someone who waits passively for her husband.

Wives want husbands who are willing to have a deep conversation about their feelings, desires, hopes, dreams- all in the pursuit of building a better relationship with each other.

Prioritize the Positive

It would be best if you focused on the positives and your wife’s strengths. You will be surprised that most men tend to overlook this, but women are very emotional creatures. When they start feeling their self-esteem being threatened by their husband is not giving them the love and attention that she needs, she will be unhappy with him even if he does many other things for her.

It doesn’t matter how much you do in life or what it could be; the most important thing is that you do it with love, which your wife will recognize.

Put down your damn phone

To be a better husband to your wife, always give undivided attention when speaking with you. Never use your phone or check social media while conversing with her; it is disrespectful. When your wife asks for attention, she wants to feel loved by you; so put down the damn phone!

Take a break

Work is never-ending, and you need to learn to take time off and spend some alone time with her. It is very beneficial for your health to slow down the pace and at the same time allows you to bond with your wife, snuggle and cuddle on the sofa; this is good for both your wife and you.

Express appreciation more often

There is no perfect husband, but for any successful marriage, you must express your appreciation. Learn to be grateful to your wife for taking care of you and show her appreciation with simple things like a compliment, thank-you, or anything that will make her happy.

Remember, keeping it in your heart and not saying it out for her ears will not work. If your wife is comfortable, occasional public displays of affection will add some sparks to the marriage.

Tell your wife how much you love her.

No other words are more magical than I love you. This simple phrase will always light the spark and warm your wife’s heart. Put a greeting card or a note that will get her into the bag. Figurate obscure years like dates (first birthday, engagement day, wedding date / moving into our house) and get big on your big celebration together.

Power down and go on date night

This scenario is not about simply putting down the phone, but I am talking about all your I.T. gadgets – Mobile phones, Laptops, Tablets, Netflix, and all the nonsense.

Hold your wife’s hand, get some quality time alone and go on a date night. Talk about the little things you all have come through over the years, parenting, work, and everything under the star. Run a bubble bath for her and keep the house quiet while she has time. Paint a flashy sign on her window. Leave a love mail-in answering machine when you know no one is. Make your beds and put one rose on this pillow. Make an effort to have a romantic night and make your spouse happy.

Do not make assumptions.

Please respect your wife‘s privacy and remember that marriage is built on trust, and assumptions only open up new opportunities for conflict and stress.

There is no reason to be so paranoid unless there was no effort to maintain the relationship. If you have questions or doubts, ask nicely and clarify what you want to understand.

Talk about your finances openly

Money surprises can never be good, so stay a few steps ahead and bring your wife to a continued conversation about family financials. It just means that you won’t be secretive; you value her input and take decisive decisions as a team. Always be honest, stay positive, and support each other along the way.

Take the load off

A good marriage is built on a foundation where no matter the job, as a husband, you should share your responsibility, so your partner doesn’t feel overwhelmed.

Make your spouse feel you understand and appreciate her by making efforts to help out. Nothing is ever too small; it is the gesture that counts.

Seek to understand, not to agree

A married couple will not always meet in opinions, and there will be differences. It is not about pointing fingers and saying who is wrong.

It would help if you understood your partner’s perspective on the beliefs and did not try to entice them with any tactics to win the argument.

It will make her feel that she is respected and be able to express herself better without feeling like he’s trying to convince her. Too many couples forget how important it is to understand each other, and the relationship can’t grow stronger if you don’t agree on anything. It may seem not easy at first, but it is worth it to have a healthy relationship.

Tell me the best way to love you this week

Sometimes, wives feel obligated by what their husbands try to do for them. In order not to hurt our egos, they tend to accept it.

Remember, while taking a proactive approach, it may not necessarily be what your wife wants, and remember, everyone, is different. I recommend being upfront and asking your wife what the best way to help or support her is. Be open and receptive to her idea; you will never know what is on her mind and may even be in for a treat.

Give your spouse time alone

Leaving your spouse from yours can be an excellent way to renew them. Take your kids away from her and let her go shopping with friends or have a hotel for a night alone, or have a nice self-help day. It also allows you both ’til you miss each other, which can help both of you with affection when you visit each other again.

Help around the house

One of the self-improvement must learn for most married men. It can be as simple as cleaning up after dinner. Doing things that your spouse usually does is a way to show you care and want them and the family to work hard.

Bring flowers home for no reason

It’s sweet to gift flowers during Valentine’s Day, birthday anniversary, or an anniversary. But no one will be surprised, as is expected.

Bring flowers home in the absence of reasons only because it will remind your spouse of your affections. It will help her acknowledge that she is valuable and cherished.

Take responsibility for what you can

Sometimes you’re creating a problem or either a contributor to the problem. Assuring someone responsible for their behavior is VERY important. It’s like saying that you’re fine and that you can’t make any mistakes.

If you are at fault, man up and admit your mistakes and say you are sorry if needed, your wife will appreciate you for who you are.

Make an effort with their family

You promised you’d get into a relationship in the best and worst way, including close family. Marriage is also a form of focus to coexist peacefully with family members.

However, you feel it may feel defensive for no reason but remember that patience is important. If it is not working out, be very respectful and focus on communication with your wife.

Never stop saying, “I love you.”

One of the most important things in a relationship is a love language. Without it, there would be no reason to stay together and work through problems. Your spouse needs to know that you love her; it is a form of assurance for her. It is a constant reminder that you want to be with them for better or worse, in sickness and health.

Compliment them without being asked.

Women need to feel valued and cherished. A woman will not want a man who does nothing but criticizes her or gives little appreciation for the good she has done.

Saying something nice about your spouse will make them happy; they know that you appreciate and value their uniqueness, talents, beauty, etc. It builds her up, and she will be happier in the relationship.

It is a small gesture that can make someone feel loved and significant. It goes back to the understanding of each other; it’s not about what you like or dislike but rather how the person is feeling.

Rekindle your love story once more

Make an effort to create a first date with your spouse, romance her with a nice dinner that includes small talk, to know each other once again. It will help you both connect and remember what it was like when your relationship first began; experiencing the same feelings again can make your wife feel special and is also helpful to your emotional wellbeing.

Final Thoughts On How to be a Better Husband

Marriage is for a lifetime, and if you want to be a good husband, the first step is understanding how your wife thinks and feels. There needs to be constant romance and respect with your partner.

Making efforts to be a better husband has only positive benefits, which essentially even benefit your kids. Once you’ve done that, it will make everything else easier.